Archive for parents
Real Mums Reviews – Baby Wipe Warmers
Posted by: | CommentsThe cynic in me (or perhaps its the realist in me) has long believed that if you mention the word “wedding” or “baby” the price of stuff goes up. Add an extra “0″ to the price.
I also believe, particularly in relation to babies, there is a whole heap of crap “they” try to sell you that you don’t really need. I like to call it “Emotional Blackmail”.
Some of these things are downright ridiculous. Seriously, are we so intent on breeding an entire generation of kids who have zero concept that there is perhaps a little bit of discomfort in the world.
If this isn’t Extreme Overprotective Parenting (EOP) then I don’t know what is. Welcome to the Baby Wipe Warmer!
(My first thought when I saw these was “Are you fucking kidding me?!” And I don’t usually swear in reviews)
Let me be upfront, as that is the point of a good review. I don’t actually own one of these, because I’m not stupid enough to buy one myself, and even my friends who purchase me the most ironic of gifts would know they’d have it thrown back at their heads within moments of me unwrapping it.
Aside from neglecting your child from experiencing a bit of reality for a mere 3 seconds at a time (and if it didn’t poo so often, it wouldn’t experience this abuse on such a regular basis) and depriving yourself of the enjoyment of payback with a cold, moist cloth, you also get to pay for the privelege of owning one. At the expense of your Vodka habit, of course, which is also most suitable for aiding you with a baby who squirms when you wipe it’s bum.
Of course, oh evil mummy, if you don’t buy one, you’re child will undoubtably grow up with severe emotional and psychological issues, and quite possibly Post Traumatic Stress Disorder at the prolonged abuse you have inclflicted upon him or her for the first 2-3 years of it’s life. Like it will even remember how horrible you were to it.
Sheesh.
The funniest thing, however – even more riduculous than there very fact that these products are out there and being purchased (dare I say, by moronic parents who have either been sucked in BIG TIME or have EOP Syndrome) – when I searched, over 104,000 links came up! WTF?!, and there are over thirty different sorts of baby wipe warmers you can purchase, including travel wipes warmers!
One even comes with a light! Because? You’re a moron with more money than sense, who finds it hard to see in the dark? I’m guessing.
It’s products like this that make me really wish I’d run with some of my freaking ridiculous ideas that sound fabulous at 2am, but in the harsh light of day are, well, freaking ridiculous. I might be closer to living the reality of a holiday in the Bahamas.
So, if you’ve been sucked in to purchasing one of these, go see your psych about dealing with your EOP, and your GP to see if they have any meds to help. And if you’ve nothing better to spend you’re money on, feel free to send some my way. I take cash, Visa and sauvignon blanc (preferably from Marlborough, NZ).
I’m still shaking my head in disbelief that products like this are actually selling … some people will sell anything to expectant parents. And it’s wrong, I tell you. Wrong!
Note: EOP or Extreme Overprotective Parenting is not a real disorder. Yet. It’s one that I made up just today. However, if you have purchased a baby wipe warmer and it wasn’t a sarcastic gift for someone else, I think it may be more real than we believe and should perhaps be listed in the DSM.
A crummy fundraiser that’s great for your abs – but not the pelvic floor
Posted by: | CommentsHow cool is this?
OK, I’m not on the school parent committee dictatorship (my hair isn’t easy to manage enough, and I can’t stand the “we didn’t do that last year” crap) but if I was, I’d grab these chicks.
I have used them for fundraising efforts before (Mums’ Night Out! 2007 and 2009) just not in this format – and I think it is soooo cool! Wendy Little and Carolyn Chillura team up in Crummy Mummies – to put the “fun” back in “fundraising” …
Their flyer says:
Make your next fundraising event a night to remember with two of Melbourne’s favourite stand-up comedi-mums, Wendy Little and Carolyn Chillura. Providing a hilarious insight into parenthood and the journey getting there and beyond – Crummy Mummies are sure to provide a fun factor at your next trivia night or wine and cheese night or they can organise an entire comedy night for you.
Contact:
Crummy Mummies – enquiries@crummymummies.com.au
Visit their website – www.crummymummies.com.au
Unlike a chocolate drive (yes, yet another bloody one) I can vouch that these two are fantastic for your abs! They come fat-free and give you a work out.
I just can’t promise they’re any good for your pelvic floor. Except to let you know whether its working well or not.
Now … what event can I organise next …
Bouncing Baby Boys … and the problem is …???
Posted by: | CommentsI am now – despite cries of disagreement from seemingly the rest of the world – the mother of three boys.
According to just about everyone else in the world, despite the gorgeousness and “goodness” of my new addition, I must be somewhat disappointed. Surely I was desperate for a girl? And how am I going to cope with yet another boy?!
I literally had a neighbour recently stop me in the street, ask if I had had a girl, then wave her hand, state “Nevermind” and walk away without even asking to take a look at a week old baby, let alone any details!
You see, the thing is, I grew up around boys. My dad cared for us, mostly, during the day and I had two brothers. I married into a family dominated by boys (six of them, including my husband). I’ve always had better relationships with males. They’re less complicated. Although they are more bouncy.
Growing up, I didn’t have a particularly good relationship with my mother. In all honestly, the possibility of having a girl frightened the bejeezus out of me. Then I wouldn’t know how to cope.
Sadly, I see so many Mother’s of Boys (and, for the most part, a girl or two in tow as well) struggling with the concept of “boy”. Friends of mine rushing their testosterone bundles off to paediatricians and child psychologists due to their boisterousness, their obsessions with machinery and their need to run, bounce, climb and yell. Loudly!
Women pulling their hair out about their boys not sitting still, getting up to mischief and not enjoying a day out shoe shopping.
Its something I’ve not dealt with myself. Perhaps its my exposure to the male species over most of my lifespan that I can view this behaviour, shake my head and say “bloody idiot”, whilst accepting and loving my boys unconditionally. Perhaps it’s the relationship I had with my mother.
Perhaps its just that Barbie Pink makes me physically ill after prolonged periods.
Who knows?
Chris Owen, a fellow mother of three boys, although hers are much more growed up than mine (and Mummy Mentor to me, although she doesn’t know it yet 
) wrote about Boys Will Be Boys – And So What? on the blog, Joyful Jubilant Learning.
She offers a number of valuable lessons in this post, but the bit that struck a cord for me was this:
Rearing sons has taught me to always be prepared to be surprised. In other words – I can’t be in control. (Not a concept that a control-freak mother likes to consider!)
What I have discovered is that loving them without expectations, and just the way they are, is the only way to set them free and stay sane at the same time.
It’s a philosophy I have lived with with my boys, including my husband pre-kids (but that’s a different story). I think its a great piece of advise and one all Mothers of Boys would do well to take on board.
My life – as chaotic and mayhemish as it is at times - is, at the same time, relaxed and filled with fun. I embrace the fact that boys need chaos, they need to run, jump and climb.
I embrace that they sometimes need their Mummy, that Mummy Cuddles can fix a lot of hurts, and they’re no less a ‘man’ for asking for one. This has given them confidence and security.
Accepting this is who they are and just ‘what they do” has given me peace. In more ways than one. Peace, despite the noise levels boys need to function at.
They are, after all, not referred to as Bouncing Baby Boys for nothing.
We are all individuals
Posted by: | CommentsFollowing on from my post of last month – We are all different – I’m constantly reminded of how we are just so not treated like individuals.
Having raised two boys to a decent age (and planning to continue to raise them for a lot longer, whether I like it or not … as well as see them thrive to a ripe old age) I am faced daily with a need to manage them to some degree. Mostly in relation to their behaviours.
Add another kid to the mix and it just adds more fun.
With the plethora of parenting books currently available, designed to assist us in terms of getting kids to sleep, tactics for taming toddlers and beyond, you’d think we’d have a handle on it.
Particularly with the likes of the experts involved in penning these fabulous resources. Generally, I’m finding that each author – wise as they are – peddles their method as being the One True Technique, with little accounting for the individuality of parents.
The reality of it is that parents grow up with their own experiences. They have been children and have been parented in a certain way. They read and learn things. They, as a rule, socialise with their peers throughout their life, come into contact with other parents and, therefore, other parenting styles.
There are lots of factors, all of which go toward shaping the parent they will one day become. Or that they currently are.
And each of these factors individualises the parent. Which pretty much influences their parenting, which pretty much influences their parenting style.
I don’t refer to these experts, authors or their works as “fabulous” facetiously. I genuinely mean they all have something great to offer. Some will have something to offer some parents, however, whilst others can offer them very little, if not nothing.
Our individuality as parents, and as people first and foremost, just means that some methods will sit better with some of us than others. Some tactics will just work for us easily, and others won’t, or we may just feel more comfortable with one than another.
Perhaps it is time that we, rather than taking on the recommendation of a friend, or feeling a bit ick for choosing a different behaviour taming technique than our peers, we take on the fact that we are, in fact all individuals. For the most part, what we do is not “wrong”, its just wrong in the eyes of a particular author, expert or their loyal follower/s.
Pick up another book and you’re doing it just right.
Consider who you are, your core beliefs and what you feel comfortable doing. Then, should you feel the need to pick up a book, choose the expert that best sits with you.
We have enough Loss of Identity when we have kids anyway, do we really need to lose any more by having someone tell us we’re “doing it wrong”?
Of course, just as we are all individuals, so too are our children. But that’s a whole other post ….
